Blended families have several challenges and barriers. One serious problem that escalates out of control is the way the new husband and wife feels about their kid(s). Better known as the Kid Factor! Each is committed to his or her own flesh and blood, while they’re merely acquainted with the other(s). The problem is when kid(s) sense tension between the parents, they will use it as an opportunity to exploit the situation to their advantage. Therefore, set boundaries for both sets of siblings. Discuss between husband and wife who should handle the discipline and how. Then share these new rules with everyone. I like to call the Barrier Dissolver! Just remember love is the key to barrier breaker.
Posts tagged ‘LOVING HER’
Are you ready for a change in your life? A new adventure, new scenery, new love, new attitude, new home, whatever your desire it begins with you. Just know changes come with a price. It’s like being in the hand of a potter; being remolded or reshaped. The end result is unknown. The bottom-line change is for the best….. GET READY FOR A CHANGE TODAY!
“If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.” ― George Bernard Shaw
For decades there have been hidden within families skeletons dancing around seeking freedom. When will the day come that you will set yours free?
Remember, your enemy can’t hold you hostage if all your skeletons are out of the closet…..
God has a plan for you!
Moses raised another objection to God: “Master, please, I don’t talk well. I’ve never been good with words, neither before nor after you spoke to me. I stutter and stammer.” (Exodus 4:10 MSG)
Just as with Moses so with you! God desires to take your disability and use it for his ability. Remember, God is seeing you as his masterpiece not a broken piece. So arise and do the unthinkable prove the devil to be who he is a liar.
“You must remember, family is often born of blood, but it doesn’t depend on blood. Nor is it exclusive of friendship. Family members can be your best friends, you know. And best friends, whether or not they are related to you, can be your family.”
― Trenton Lee Stewart,
Today, I thank God for the blood of Jesus Christ.
“Genuine love is rarely an emotional space where needs are instantly gratified. To know love we have to invest time and commitment…’dreaming that love will save us, solve all our problems or provide a steady state of bliss or security only keeps us stuck in wishful fantasy, undermining the real power of the love — which is to transform us.’ Many people want love to function like a drug, giving them an immediate and sustained high. They want to do nothing, just passively receive the good feeling.”
― bell hooks
True love is not a fantasy, drug and more than a good feeling. As we invest time in others the dividends are far greater. True love is priceless!
Neither is marriage to be view as a social convenience nor simply an invention for living together. It is ordained by God to be a covenant vow of companionship and mutual complement (Genesis 2:18, 22-21; Malachi 2:14; Matthew 19:3-6), and it is meant to keep you set apart in your physical relationship for one another.
The Word of God also gives instruction’s to love your spouse (Ephesians 5:25); as yourself. If you are a believer in Christ even if your spouse never practices biblical love, you can still be at peace (Psalm 119:165) and can do your part to bring about harmony in your home. But remember you first need to examine yourself before you examine your spouse (Matthew 7:1-5). After seventeen years wife my wife I realize that marriage is truly about dying to your flesh daily. Have you die to your flesh today?
Throughout your marriage, pay particular attention to the following four behaviors (The Big Red Flags), which are considered to be especially destructive and predictive of marital failure.
Be on alert for the big red flags: criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling.￼￼￼￼
There’s a big difference between complaining and criticizing. A complaint focuses on a specific behavior, such as “I’m angry you didn’t put your clothes in the hamper.” But a criticism goes the next step and assigns a character trait, such as “You’re so lazy!”
In response to a complaint, it might seem natural to defend yourself. But rather than defuse the attack, this response usually escalates it. Defensiveness is really a way of blaming your spouse. You’re saying, in effect, “The problem isn’t me, it’s you.”
Too much negativity leads to conversations full of sarcasm, cynicism, and mockery. Contempt is poisonous to a relationship. It conveys disgust, and it eats away at any good in the relationship.
When there’s no hope of progress, one partner (the man in percent of cases) simply tunes out. He doesn’t care; he doesn’t even appear to hear. Stonewalling usually arrives last. It represents a deadly disconnection.
Criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling can sneak into even the best
of relationships. Undoubtedly, an occasional snipe at one’s spouse will occur at some point in the marriage, but be on alert—if a conscious effort is not made to stop these behaviors, they create a cycle of negativity that becomes increasingly destructive and difficult to stop. * Adapted from Gottman, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.
It’s not the make-up of your family but the deposit you’re making.
A man cannot leave a better legacy to the world than a well-educated family.” Every man and woman must decide in their lifetime what their legacy is to their children and society. Whether it is financial gains or words of wisdom, everyone has something they can leave as a legacy to humanity. It is knowing that we have a responsibility to leave a legacy that is more than half of the battle. Thomas Scott
You must deal with the truth and not run from it. Are you currently sugar coating something instead giving someone the hard facts? Just remember light overcomes darkness, so set them free today by speaking the Truth, for it is what it is!